off kilter

Is that how you spell it? Kilter? Who knows. Who cares.

I'm off balance. Slightly askew from centre. We've been sick. And too busy. And not social. And not friendly. And it causes me to be off.

And then today, I was reading an article following the families of the victims and sole survivor of last year's horrific car crash in Grande Prairie and I found myself sobbing. Sobbing at the pain of those 5 families, struggling through an unthinkable tragedy. Sobbing that I can not seem to struggle through my week of snotty, tired, cranky kids. Sobbing that I miss my social life. Sobbing that my marking is piling up. Sobbing that there is a pile at the bottom of my stairs of stuff that I need to get rid of that I can't find time to sort. Sobbing.

And I am grateful for the sobbing. Perspective always helps to refocus me. I am filled with empathy. It is the overwhelming emotion in my body on any given today. And today my empathy for those families has helped me to remember my blessings. Remember that having an off week does not define me. Remember that I can change the way I face this situation. Remember that hiding away will not solve anything.

I have my boys. Today, they are here with me, safe. Those families do not.

Thank you for the perspective.

a hole

Today I am missing my friend. Everyday since she left I have been missing her. Some days I am distracted and forget and then I remember and I am filled with an emptiness of knowing that she is not available to walk with me, share a meal, share a laugh or listen to me whine.

Who will I whine to?

Apparently you.

Thank you friend.

Abundance

Happy Thanksgiving! Every day should be thanksgiving. We should be reminded to be grateful for this life, this amazing, abundant life, everyday. Most of the world lives on the minimum required food, or less, everyday. Today we will indulge in copious amounts of food. Be grateful for that food. It devalues the struggle of those without if we take our abundance for granted.

Abundance.

An abundant life.

I am filled with gratitude for the incredible gifts that my life holds. I have a partner who stands beside me everyday, an amazing family who fill me up, friends who keep me sane, a job that I love, a home that comforts me, luxuries that I do not need,  and all the necessities that I do need. My life is full, overfull.

Today I am filled with gratitude. Everyday, even my dark days, I am filled with gratitude.

This, is a life worth living.