what did i get myself into?

i got into grad school.

i start in july.

what the hell was i thinking??

checking in

I've created a page (look up) to keep a list of the books I've been reading. Despite being busy, I still find time to read. Always. Check it out. There are very few books on it so far but I will add to the list.

Life continues on and given the loss my city is feeling this weekend, I am grateful for just that. This weekend saw the end of three young lives in a house fire. So sad. It reminds me of how precious every day is.

My new contract is incredible. I again, love my students. I have 2 amazing classes, one fun class and one challenging class. Just the right balance. 110 students. All English course. A lot of marking. But my job fills me with joy.

Joy.

This weekend I cleaned, parented, cooked, prepped 11 meals for busy days, marked, did laundry, went for a run, went to the driving range, went to multiple hockey practices and games, went to soccer, sent several emails, organized, paid bills, grocery shopped, spent time with my kids, my husband, and went for a hike in the sun.

Perfect, busy, productive.

Now on Sunday night, I feel prepared to face the week ahead. Relaxed, organized, and content.

home sick

a forced slow day. a day to stay home, watch tv, pay bills, apply for passports, do what needs to be done.

i am behind in all the boring stuff. my life gets forgotten when i am busy enjoying it. but it can not continue to run smoothly if i don't face and deal with the non-glamourous aspects of living.

so here i sit at the computer, applying for things, returning emails, phone calls, dealing with all the work that moves us forward.

and the sun is out.

and my life is full.

and i am making plans.

so despite being sick, life is good. 

setting a goal

in an effort to set a goal i am going to register for this and i am super excited and super scared.

here's to finding the runner in myself, again.

And on we go

So life is plugging along, and I'm restless. I have been restless for a while, wanting change, not sure what changes to make.

And now I know, now I am preparing for the change, making plans, getting ready, making it happen. I am nervous. Really nervous. But really excited. Excited for something new in my life. Excited for what this change will mean for me and by extension, my family.

And I was offered (and I accepted) an additional contract for next semester so now I am working full time. All English. Opportunities to love my teaching in a different way from this semester.

And in one week I'll be saying goodbye to my current classes. My all time favourite classes. Some of the most amazing students that I have ever taught. And I will miss them. Immensely. Not teaching them will be sad. Because they are awesome  and the love they give me makes my time away from my babies worth it.

And other changes are happening. The best boss that I have ever had is leaving. Retiring. Today the students celebrated her with a giant surprise party. It was amazing. And it made me hopeful that one day, at the end of my career, my students will celebrate me in the same way. There was so much love in that gym today. Incredible.

And the boys. They are growing, reading, finding a new groove in this new, busier life of ours. We are a family. We love each other. We support each other. We brave new fronts together. My love is a rock of support, holding me up, keeping me going, letting me make changes that cause some chaos but will ultimately bring positive changes.

And I have found my joy again. It was so simple but it felt so hard to find. But there it is, deep down in the recesses of my being. Joy.

And I am grateful that it has returned. Because without it I felt like less of me. And now I feel like all of me again.

the sick

these holidays will be remembered as the one when we were sick. only the kids and i. leigh never gets sick.

i hate being sick. i'm ready to be healthy. i will be healthy again just in time to go back to work.

sick of being sick.

2013

2012: I have to say that this was not my best year. Lost track of health, had lots of good friends move away, saw a friend almost die, was too stressed out, lost sight of my priorities a bit, lost focus.

But there were some highlights: Oliver's birth, awesome camping with my cousins, a great trip to Vernon, another fabulous year at my school, my boys in all their amazingness, a new friend (or 3), a great visit from my favourite friends in China, a rekindling of an old but great friendship, a wedding, babies, watching my babe fall in love with Harry Potter, hockey, family time, tubing at Mt Washington. Many good things.

I had a tradition on my other blog, my private one, where I wrote a list of things that I was looking forward to in the new year. Not resolutions but anticipations. I am going to continue that tradition here.

2013, here is what I hope for from you:

- a renewed joy. I have lost my joy a bit lately, I want it back.
- health. For my family. For my friends.
- running. I miss running. I need races and training.
- yoga. I also miss yoga.
- another year at my school.
- changes for my kids.  something. Don't know what yet.
- a trip through BC and Alberta with my boys and mom
- time with my bestie in Fernie.
- working on new friendships.
- a trip to America to see another bestie
- time with my kids. doing whatever. living this life
- a hike. a big hike. with the kids. maybe Strathcona?
- small changes to the house. A constant work of art.
- finding the contentedness that I had last year.

This is also the time to reflect on where I am today compared to a year ago. Here is last year's list:


 So, welcome 2012, here is what I am hoping for from you:

-the most important, every year is health. Mine, my family's and my friends. I would like to up the ante this year and continue what was started last year for me. I am almost back up to where I started a year ago weight wise, which is discouraging, but I am healthier and more active.
-joy, oh so much joy.
-babies, 3 of my best friends are all expecting babies in the first half of this year. Babies, gotta love them.
-runs, lots and lots of runs. I'll be starting the year with one tomorrow, then a 10k in April, half marathon in May, another half in October and hopefully many more along the way.
-work, for Leigh and I. We are blessed with jobs we enjoy.
-travel, little trips (probably all focused around hockey) and ending the year with a big trip.
-a wedding. Not just any wedding but the wedding of one of my boys, the last of the men in my life to get married. I can't wait.
-time with my babies, for they are very quickly moving away from being my babies.
-hockey, lots and lots of hockey.
-friends, new and old. Family, crazy and sane (who are we kidding, there are no sane ones).
-small changes to our home.

I want life to move along exactly how it is right now. It's good. Life is good. I am full of gratitude and joy for my life. My abundant, complete, astounding life. It may seem simple but it brings me so much contentedness.